The Fringe

I have a backwards kind of pride. Parts of my personality are introverted, but not because I find social situations exhausting or unenjoyable… but because I often care too much about what people think of me, and therefore self-protect by clamming up giving them nothing to think of me. My pride often makes me reserved. For this reason, I have felt on the “outside” of social situations many times in my life. In the depths of my soul, I want so badly to be that person that is friends with all of the “popular” kids, that has a front-and-center role socially because many parts of me are inherently extroverted. I spend way too much time agonizing over the fact that I am a fringe person, and I seem to be destined to be a fringe person for my whole life. But today, my heart had a revelation that I don’t know how I missed before. I realized that over the years, Jesus has given me periods of loneliness and an introverted personality so that I can see other lonely people. If I had all the friends I wanted, I would lose the opportunity to recognize the people who want and need my friendship. When you're a follower of Christ, you understand that everyone is His Beloved... it doesn't matter who you're friends with, because His mercy is the great equalizer. The important thing is not if you're in the "in-group" or not... it's that you're loving one of His people, which is part of your sanctification. You're becoming more and more like Him every time you love one of the "least of these." Jesus wasn't friends with the popular people. He was friends with the outcasts… the fringe people. What if I viewed my being on the fringe as an immense opportunity to bless His children, rather than a misplacement of my desired social standing? How differently would I live my life and spend my time? How much more content would I be?